Wednesday, 28 December 2011

Something I'll be working on for a few days.

I feel like being a lasy asshole so I'll put this on all of my blogs so I don't have to come up with Original Content today.

Tuesday, 27 December 2011

`"Things taste better outside .. ¬.¬ twat."`


Christmas.. was quite an occasion. I think this picture defines it. Literally eating so much I throw up.
Long story short I had a bet on whether I could eat a second plate of food in half an hour. And on the last bite I just.. threw up.
XD It was on the last 30 seconds as well. Damn.

Saturday, 24 December 2011

The Travels of David 1

A dark corridor. The growling of a pit bull. The smell of fear and the sense of despair. All thoughts were cleared from David's mind as panic began to set in. Trying to keep his mind off the situation David began digging dirt out of his nail with the nib of his biro.

Friday, 23 December 2011

Ahh SOPA!! SOPA is a bad cabbage!

Sorry for filling this blog with links for the past week, but I promise to get some original content for all my new followers soon.
And while I'm coming up with ideas here's a copy-right free video on SOPA that I suggest you torrent, megaupload, and upload to facebook.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WJIuYgIvKsc

Monday, 19 December 2011

Sunday, 18 December 2011

Good Rap Song?

Was linked to this song http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Csqp-Mslq_c by a fellow tuber, and It's a pretty fucking awesome song. Is you want to download it you can through the mediafire link that the artist uploaded it to. http://www.mediafire.com/?2b6z1xowbgn9sn3
It's about inspiration, and working for things, and all that good shit, that you don't find in the mainstream anymore.

I am such a great and spectacular artist. -David Greenfield

So I have made this great and inspirational piece of artwork for all of you who are lower then me to grovel and submit your lives to. Avert your gaze weak ones, for this may blow your mind.

Yes. Look at the emotion. The simplicity. The fact that it only took me five minutes to create this masterpiece is astonishing if not a blatant blasphemy to the powers that be.
I will tell the story to those that cannot visualise such a powerful story in the visual form.

One bright summers evening Jeremy Hermanthanew, and David Summerfield, were having a relaxing drive through the countryside. -One such drive that is only possible through a consistent and unrelenting opposition to immigration which allows foreigners to dirty our sacred landscape with their uncivilised ways. Anyway I'm getting off topic. So, sacred land, pure white sheep, and low fuel efficient cars. Our great friends David and Jeremy were having a discussion on how to export those illegal immigrants still in our country. Jeremy had the idea that they should be all shot on sight. whereas David argued that this would be a waste of resources necessary to oppose the EU, and their wish to take away the British regime of bringing guns to countries that we go to war with.
Needless to say the conversation got quite heated and Jeremy took his eyes off the road. The car started to swerve. They smashed into the tree at full force and when straight through it, thanks to the car's brilliant lack of crumple zones.

Friday, 16 December 2011

Put your ass in the air.

This story was typed by a person who thinks it's a good idea to play youtube songs on repeat for extended periods of time. Read at your own risk.

'Jeremy, that's my name. Don't wear it out.' Tom said as he used his sexy-eyes technique on the girl at the bar. Tom was a 5'11" 20 year old slim built male. He liked to think of himself as a fine catch. The only problem was, that his sexy-eyes technique made him look somewhat like a cross between a rapist and a heroine addict looking for his next fix.
This combined with his bad wardrobe choice, wearing a long trench-coat, that made him look somewhat like a paedophile, meant that the exotic looking 20-something was a far bit freaked out by his sudden intrusion. In full fight or flight mode, the girl grabbed the bottle of pepper-spray that a few of her girlfriends had encouraged her to buy. Spraying our protagonist in the face with said pepper-spray, the girl let out a very aggressive scream, a battle-cry if you must. Even through the pain of pesticide-grade pepper spray Tom was still able to smile a bit as he realised how feisty this woman was. He started to congratulate himself on choosing such a courageous mate for the evening. But all thought stopped as the woman, realising that the pepper spray had finished, kicked him square in the balls. Her high-heels going straight through the fabric and sinking into something fleshy yet elastic. Tom blacked out.
Tom opened his eyes. Blinked. And looked around. He was lying on the ground, which was now white.. and had swallowed him up? Tom started to panic, looking around. Electronic equipment too complicated for his mind to understand, lights as bright as the sun. Tom realised that he must have been abducted by aliens. Then he started to feel the pain. So the aliens had castrated him? And that pub situation was just some crash way to make his brain deal with the trauma? Tom rested his head on the soft white ground again. And screamed all the air out of his lungs.
'What's wrong mister Hunter? You aren't due for more pain-killers in 2 hours.' Cold hands on his face.
'Who are you? Where am I? TAKE ME TO YOUR LEADER!!' Tom screamed. The hands left his face to reveal a human. Tom was confused, and a bit stunned.
'Mr Hunter, you're at George Cross hospital. I'm Doctor Staten You were the victim of an assault in a public house. Do you remember any of this?'
Tom nodded his head. 'Oh, we're in hospital?' Feeling the blush creep up his cheeks as he realised how many people must have heard his screaming.
'You were very lucky Mr Hunter, the heel went right through the middle of your scrotum, but missed your testicles by about 2 millimetres. After the skin heals you'll be good as new.' Looking over his head, the doctor added, 'Oh, and the person who assulted you road with you in the ambulance, she was very worried and wants to apologise for acting so brutishly.'
Tom looked past Dr Staten to see the exotic goddess of his dreams. The one-night-stand from hell. The proof that sexy-eyes worked.

Saturday, 26 November 2011

Where is everyone?

My viewer count's gone way down. Bit lame, as I feel like i'm getting used to blogging as a hobby.
Here's something that i'm working on to post to my other blog btw.
Trying out some new techniques on this tablet that I finally got to work. And thought that include a character I used for an earlier post.
Here are the results so far.

Monday, 21 November 2011

Weirdest Dream yet.

Had a dream about my dad selling me to the sex industry today. God, I never want think about that dream again. But I managed to escape in the dream anyway, guess that's a plus. Probably has something to do with me worrying about my worth thanks to low test scores, and then realising that it only really matters to my dad, and that I can carry on without them. Wooh. *_*

Wednesday, 16 November 2011

Another update.

So, I'm apparently revising for the five tests i have coming up in january. -Atleast that's what i've told my tutor. heh heh heh. >.>
Maybe I'll post some of my amazingly interesting revision notes on here. Along with the rest of my boring ass storys.

Monday, 14 November 2011

Pancakes

Twelve steps. Left right left. Focus. Blink. Focus. Try to maintain sanity. A metal fork in white knuckled fingers. Stab. Gulp. Stab. I have to stop this. I grab the fork from the full blooded hand. I pull. The fork goes clashing to the ground. Covered in syrup.
'Don't eat my pancakes.'


Chris has a slight look of annoyance, mixed with the aura of shock that fills the small breakfast house.

Saturday, 29 October 2011

Quick little update

So Right now I'm studying Economics, Maths, Chemistry, and Further Maths. Which are really hard subjects, but I’m a bit of a workaholic, in that, if I don't think I’m working 'hard enough' I tend to slack off. So, right now, I have an entire unit of Chemistry to catch up on, and subsequent revision cards that need to be filled out. As well as about 4 Economics sheets I need to fill in. And I need to research electrical engineering as a career. All of which need to be done by Monday - Tuesday. Plus I might go to tennis tomorrow.
Boring stuff.
Anyway, about the holiday, I did draw a few good pictures, and am attempting to find a suitable way to photograph them, without all that blur from my damn shaky hands.
So, the holiday was good, not so much nude beach volleyball as last year. But I did forget to pay for a burger on the last evening of my stay, so I'm going to avoid that area next year. XD

Sorry for putting you through that, but to make up for it here's some Aphex Twin!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MBFXJw7n-fU
 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uP_3goBZj1Y#t=04m18s


Thursday, 29 September 2011

I'm Back!

I'm here again, and i have a new idea for a story, about corruption, and freedom. Hope it'll turn into a good story.

Wednesday, 3 August 2011

A Little Update

I'm going to be on holiday for three and a half weeks -till around the 29th or August-. I'm going to Greece so I'll be bringing back some cool photos for you guys around that time.

Tuesday, 26 July 2011

Dream 2

 DAAAAAAmn. Ok, this dream has very VERY horrifying -and slightly sexual- scenes in it. Read at your own peril! >:D
-also wall of only lightly edited text warning for anyone that's reading this on a phone.


Sunday, 24 July 2011

A Guide to Cloning

Ok, wow so I've just woken up from a my first recurring dream. Basically it's all about me cloning myself and it messing up. I think i might try and do a short writing on this soon.

>finds guide to cloning
>guide comes in mail
>solder components together finding on and off switch
>take tissue samples from parts of my body
>mix together in the jar that comes with the guide / components
>attach component-jar lid to jar
>end up with a mixture of stuff
>leave in the cupboard as the guide says
>come back from tennis to find that jar is now gone and completely naked and fully formed version of me is sitting there basically 'dead' hanging out my cupboard
>attach other device to the clone's head
>turn on device
>nothing happens
>i panic and end up hiding the body in the freezer
>dream ends
>back into dream
>I'm trying to find what's wrong with the device.
>find a link in the guide to TDKnuckle's channel
>turns out that he's the person that made the guide
>someone knocks on the door
>i open it to find mafia looking guys storming into my house
>they ask where my mother is
>they start asking for money
>i start worrying about whether they might find the body
>i start wishing that i'd separated the parts and put them in a bin or something
>i find a streak of line running down my nose
>realise that the line looks like the bottom of a kazoo
>try to reach for it
>my fingers go right through it
>decide that it's a trick of the light / my eye's are messing up
>eye's start hurting
>blink with left eye, then right eye, then both
>i open my eye's and i'm in bed.

So there you go! Man, that was a crazy night. I like how my brain always seems to put all of my dreams onto a cliffhanger for some reason.

Friday, 22 July 2011

I am the king of stailmate!!

Ok, so.. my first personal post on here. Basically i made some plans with a friend to go and play tennis today. So, after getting up very hungry i ended up having a breakfast of four Fried Eggs two Instant noodle packets and one plate of chick pea curry and rice (lots'a rice! 8D) and a cup of black coffee. After that i left for a day of tennis with -let's call him- Cornelius the Private Investigator, who met me at our planned meet up point (helipad). Which was pretty weird as it takes me forty minutes to fly by helicopter to 'Restaurant of Breakfast Lunches,' while it only takes him about 20 minutes by jet-pack. So, Cornelius the Private Investigator and me eventually arrived at the Great British Sports Garden (GBSG), and went into the advanced tennis section. When we saw the grounds filled water we were saddened by all of the effort, and jet fuel that seemed to have been wasted in this journey. Luckily though we know the owner of GBSG personally and he was able to give us a ticket to the Great Chess Tournament of United Greatness. Needless to so we beat all their asses at the games and ended up being faced off against eachover. So, it was Me, your great 1ockedand1oaded, beloved by all 53 of my fans, and Cornelius the Private Investigator, with his various connections with News of the World, due to his assassination requests from Rupert Murdock. Let's just say it was intense. Rupert was there, scowling up at me. Cameras were flashing, trying to get shots of me under my tennis briefs. As the day became dark and the evening clouds drew nearer, me and Cornelius were still at it. 3 draws later. You see, Cornelius has a problem. He can't finish the job. I can. With just a king i was able to trick him into drawing with me 3 times! And on this 4th game it was looking like another draw would happen. It happened and with 4 games -which Rupert claimed he should have won- Cornelius was distraught. In fact, i was writing this story earlier today, on my helicopter, and my security system started to go crazy. It turned out i had been fired on by ground control because my helicopter had been deleted by some lulzy hacker. I got mad lulz from that one.

-based off a true story-

Thursday, 21 July 2011

Maturity?


An interesting take on life. Hope you enjoy this speech that I found!

Wednesday, 20 July 2011

New scribble

Check its!! :D

So, I want to continue the narrative blogging idea that i had on here before but i'm having some trouble with ideas. Can you guys help me out with your great and powerful imaginations so that i can let the creative juices flow once more? o.0 ok, that sounds weird, but it's a pretty bad sensation to be artistically dry for this long.

Sunday, 17 July 2011

Uploaded a new doodle today.

Today was pretty boring, so I'll just show you to my over blog where I've put a few of my (!) amazingly artistic (!) scribbles.

http://internetsketchpad.blogspot.com/2011/07/d-sundays.html
http://internetsketchpad.blogspot.com/2011/05/is-this-thing-still-here.html

Thursday, 14 July 2011

How a flamethrower really works.

An awesome little video about how a lot of weapons in main stream movies are not as they appear. -video contains a dead pig which at the end of the video turns into bacon.

odd. the video aparently doesn't work right now so here's the basic link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D9DkciMTsLI

How to block youtube ads

Just made a youtube video on how to block youtube adverts if anyone's interested in it. Please comment on it if you could.
Here's the raw-uncut version. I'll have the edited one by the end of the week.
The main reason why i made this one was because I can never find any how to's on how to block adverts with opera, when it really is so easy.

Monday, 11 July 2011

Mondays

So it's Monday today and I'm getting ready to have a week of staring at boards. Yep. School sure is fun! And not a complete waste of time in any sense.
err.. So i'm looking through underground house building so I can continue my quest of world domination and you can see one of the guides here.
Here's a fun little comic I made about the power of ice cream.
So after a 'hard' day of staring at teachers, I have one question to ask you. Why is there ham in my pocket?
Oh, and for some comedic relief, I accidentally said "so.. do we have to wear clothes?" when speaking about a coming school trip.

Sunday, 10 July 2011

Hi peeps.

So, it's ten thirty on Sunday today and I'm pretty stumped on what to blog about. So here's a few pictures from my minecraft account. :)
Actually it's one big picture made from one day's travel but.. whatyagonnado?

Saturday, 9 July 2011

Running: Chapter two. A Terrible Thing

Before you read this I just want to say that I've decided that the 'Running' story series is going to be a collection of short stories instead of one long novel. as such this story probably wont have anything to do with the last one. I may join the storys into some interlinking time line some way across the roads but right now this story is a different story. :P
Chapter one
Chapter two

Wednesday, 22 June 2011

A week of random

Sorry about the whole, -leaving randomly- time. I promise that when my exams are over I'll be pretty regular.

I've been finding some pretty good videos the past few days so I'm sharing them with you. Make sure to watch these just before you go to sleep.

Wednesday, 15 June 2011

Story: Running Chapter one

Chapter one: Change Blows
Chapter two:Where's your Happy Face?

Jake ran through the halls of the hospital. His faded white trainers squeaking as they rubbed against the reflective checker-board imitation-marble floor. His frantic eyes found what they were looking for. Jake ran towards the hard metal door that opened to the emergency escape shuttle.

Monday, 13 June 2011

Running: Change Blows

8D I just accidentally deleted the first draft, so you'll all have to read the latest post instead!! yeah.

I type at a sertain speed and that is postable

Is this obviously bragging worthy of such a clean a high class blog? 1ockedand1oaded thinks so, and if he thinks it it should be, it will be.
And if you don't like typing you can go to the website to test yourself here. :D

Sunday, 5 June 2011

0.o

So, my last post didn't have the video in it for some reason. weird. Here's the song:


Saturday, 4 June 2011

Friday, 3 June 2011

/Title/

So, I was reading this post on: a blog on 'a piece of net' and found this youtube channel full of inspirational talks and events.
Looking around the channel I came across this video about how "schools kill creativity." It tells us that the schools, and in-fact the general education system put into place is very misguided, and usually undermines education of certain kinds to favor those seen as 'useful in life.' The fact is that of the very small percentage of our earthly population, the amount of people who can do more than work towards an endless goal do not.
I seem to have a bad habit of making the important things depressing to others, so I'll just say that 'THE SYSTEM IS KEEPING US DOWN MAN' and leave you guys with a smile and hopefully a new push that you can use to further the success of, whatever you are good at.

If you don't like links then here's the embedded version of the previously mentioned video, (it is 20 minutes long though, so you may want to go to the native page to avoid eye-strain from the small screen):

Thursday, 2 June 2011

Some pick me up music


I maddeningly happy song. I think this was in spongebob SPs but i can't be sure.

Wednesday, 1 June 2011

Bringing home lead laced bacon. i.e. METAL WITH SOUL

This is what I would class as a classic metal song. Because metal isn't about head banging. Nor is it about rage, or another emotion. It's about the tempo, and the way the instruments mix to create something solid. True hardened metal.
I'll just shut up and let you enjoy the music. :)

Scatmen'sday

Here's a tune that for me, is full of nostalgia. It's a song by a scat artist named "Scatman John." This went viral on the radio stations in the times before the internet, when people listened to am radio in their cars.
The song tells the artist's life story, of how he got into the scat genre through his speach impediment. He retells the liberation of realising that his stuttering is not a curse, but a gift, as he turned his stutters into his 'sound.' It's a pretty good tune with a nice message.

Tuesday, 31 May 2011

To the space elevator Nigel!

Yep, you heard right. A Space Elevator. This isn't part of the daily blog, but I thought I should share this with you guys seeing as how this is the thought log, blog.

Monday, 30 May 2011

That song that just makes you go: "what?", but in a good way.

The general idea behind this post is to point out a section of music that I seem to be hearing a lot recently. Songs that once I finish listening to I'm overcome with befuddlement. Feel free to post your one experiences below. If I get enough comments I might start a new blog to post other things like this.

 Take this song, 'As Tyrants Fall,' by Heavy metal band, "Fleshgod Apocalypse." Typical heavy metal band right? Machine gun percussions, throat ripping deathcore vocals, insane tempo changes, and.. a minute long classical ending. That's right, if you click on the video below and skip to 2:56 you will have the softest cushiest classical beat to skip to the office to. :3

Jokes aside, the ending is very well synced to the general album's sense of stretching suspense. Not to mention the obvious skill needed to play instruments at that level. I just can't help but feel like I'm at the receiving end of a big metal rick roll.

One day.. I'll be in the movies!

Another notebook entry, This is more of a stage direction thing, like the start of a movie. I'm not sure why, but then I was fascinated with how movies could start, from the crash of a car (a car movie), to the falling of a feather (flubber):

If copyright didn't exist we'd remake blade trinity. But it does and we don't want to sign any papers. So.. *Stand up, rasing hand in the air, just as weapon falls into hands. Also, a pack of aliens of different species storm the horizon.* ..we decided to make an alien / time-travel movie instead.

So.. obviously if you're Chinese it is illegal for you to read this. I believe the weapon that i was talking about is the sword that the arbiter wields in halo 3. The aliens would range from  H. R. Giger's Alien, to a big jelly-blob based form.
 ..And my friends would look at me with the same weirded out face that your giving this monitor if I ever had shown this to them. XD

Sunday, 29 May 2011

Circular thinking

Here's something that I found in one of my notebooks from about 2 years ago.

Sometimes during time travel memories can become interlinked. These links last after and before the actual event of time travel. But, are not usually realised as effects of time travel until the subject uses time travel. Such is the nature of time travel.

0.0' Yep. That makes perfect sense.